Aloha, adventurers! This game is a little different than most, so feel free to take a swig of coconut rum for courage. Time to dust off those Ultra Lounge CDs from college – to solve a murder! Remember, new games gently wash up onto inboxes twice a month, so be sure to subscribe…
Instructions:
Throughout the game you’ll find linked clues. They’ll help you solve the mystery!
Click up to 3 clues. Choose wisely.
BONUS: Forward this game to a friend. You may click up to 5 clues. (And thanks for helping us find new players!)
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You pull the bamboo handle on the door of Tiki Steve’s. It’s across the street from Tiki Dan’s and two blocks down from Tiki Brandon’s, in the heart of the White Guy Tiki Bar District. The drinks here are liquid candy, their logo was illustrated by a guy named Swingin’ Rick, and they play “So Danco Samba” every eleven minutes. A real tough joint.
Inside you find a dimly lit bar plastered in Polynesian decor, like a small hula girl statue, a topless hula girl painting, and divorce papers from Tiki Steve’s ex-wife. The bar is a mess. Police tape partially covers a tiki mask on the back wall. There is a pool of blood, a pool of pricey mixed drink, and a bubble gum wrapper on the floor near a dead body. Oh hey, a dead body! The victim was a chubby guy lying dead in a sparkling plastic booth. His gut is peeking out the bottom of a Quagmire-esque Hawaiian shirt.
You ask Tiki Steve, the cue bald bartender with a bright red goatee, for a Scorpion Bowl and an explanation. As he takes out several bottles of rum and a grenadine syringe, he pours you a glass of the lowdown.
“Benny was the envy of the bar. He won tonight’s rare Hawaiian shirt contest and got a $500 gift card to the mall! Benny was having a grand old time with his three pals. I did my nightly show where I gather everyone around the bar and light up five drinks in a row to the tune of ‘So Danco Samba’. One of the waitresses blinks the Christmas lights. It’s a spectacle! When the show was over, we turned around and saw that Benny was murdered. Poisoned! Just like my wife poisoned our kids against me.”
Benny’s three pals are all sitting next to each other on stools, waiting to be questioned. There’s Lana, his petite ex-high school girlfriend. She’s wearing a Hawaiian shirt as a dress, drinking a Hurricane. Next to her is Denise. She was Benny’s rich, tall Hawaiian shirt dealer. She wears a Hawaiian shirt around her neck, preppy-style, drinking a Mai Tai. Finally, there’s muscle-bound Spike. He was Benny’s heroin dealer. Spike’s wearing a blood-stained white shirt and gold chains, drinking a beer with a paper umbrella in it.
The cop is mesmerized by a TV in the corner playing A Very Brady Sequel. Looks like it’ll be up to you – someone with no experience or qualifications solving murders – to solve this murder.
Who would you like to j’accuse?
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