23 Comments
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This is my most recent scam story. I got a call from an "AT&T customer care representative" saying that because I was a longtime customer, I was eligible for a discount on my plan. All I had to do was confirm some information. I should've been skeptical, but I am a longtime AT&T customer, and damn it, don't I DESERVE a discount for my loyalty?!

As I'm rattling off my name, address, phone number, email address, I start to think about how no one from AT&T has ever called me before. Ever. Maybe this is weird? And when they ask for my social to confirm my account, I hang-up in a panic. When I Googled it, apparently it was a telemarketing scheme at the time. I took some security precautions afterward. So when I hear about someone who fell for a scam, I always think that it can happen to anyone. Present company included!

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I ended up with 250 gold...hooray! I’m happy the other assassins were at MurderCon for the weekend. 😁

Getting scam voicemails always gives me a good chuckle. Usually I’m referred to as “Mr. Deeming” or on occasion something very far out there like “Mr. Peming.” I received a voicemail a few days ago...can’t remember what the guy said it was for exactly...but he very politely asked for my social security number. 🤣

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author

And mom said assassinating the mayor wouldn't get you anywhere. Parents, what do they know?

Me too. I always enjoy getting a call from my favorite Carmen Sandiego villain, "Scam Likely."

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May 6, 2022Liked by Geoffrey Golden

185 gold! Sure, you can have some, but I’m gonna need you to deposit 20gp into my account at the treasure bank to cover the handling fees. Once I see it’s there, I’ll withdraw the gold and send it to you via raven. Here, I’ve written my account number on this parchment for you.

Oh, and this loan will accrue interest at 777% APR until paid back in full.

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author

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy. Free gold!!! Ol’ Geoffrey’s ship has finally come in!

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May 6, 2022Liked by Geoffrey Golden

😇

As for my scam story, I’m not at liberty to discuss it at length in such a public forum, but I can assure you it had *nothing* to do with the Dark Mana Net, Bitgold, and several vials of Magical Dancing Mania Amalgamation 🤫🤐😶

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i ended up with 275 in gold! woo hoo! my scam was similar to your phone company story, only in my case it was the (fake) power company. i was in the middle of giving my account info when it occurred to me that the power company would never be calling ME... they'd have me on hold for an hour :-| luckily i didn't get very far before pulling the plug.

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author

Wow, that’s a lot of gold! Well played!

Yeah, it’s a tricky scam. Glad to know I’m not the only one who got flimmed by that flam.

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May 5, 2022Liked by Geoffrey Golden

50 gold, somehow ended up better than I expected after the first 2

about scammers, well... Neither I nor my family have fall for one but there was one that was horrifying: it happened when everyone but one of my sister's was here... Fuckers claimed that they kidnapped her...

My mom was desperate, but it ended up being nothing

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author

Oh god, that's horrible. So sorry your family went through that. Glad it was just a bluff.

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Wow, that’s terrible!

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May 5, 2022Liked by Geoffrey Golden

The dumbest scam I remember was back in '06 when I tried to buy tickets to some indie comedy festival off Craigslist. I did the stupid thing of PayPal-then-tix and guy disappeared. I was so embarrassed telling someone I wanted to impress that I got scammed lol. So I started calling the phone number on his PayPal account to troll him after, but no one ever answered. Four days later, an old man finally answered the phone. I told him what happened and he yelled off-call "daniel is this your bullshit again?!!?" then hung up on me.

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author

As you were describing the scam I was thinking, "This has GOT to be Daniel."

Yeah, that's such a problem. It's the suckered who feels the shame, when it should be the scammers.

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Gotta say, Daniel’s bullshit is a problem, but the old man needs to step up here and turn Daniel into the authorities.

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It's the only way he'll learn! *Waggles cane in the air*

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Damn, no one owes money like me? 🫣

-130 gold

How??!

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author

You may not have money, but you have something better: the friends you made along the way.

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I wasn’t planning on crying myself to sleep but okay. It’s your Substack.

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I lost 100 gold right of the bat! I reclaimed some dignity by the end but my pockets are definitely dry.

A long time ago, I replied to an email I thought was from my bank and entered my log in information. I had some money stolen but realized it before they could take too much. I was refunded the money and am very cautious now.

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author

I’m glad you got refunded! Our inboxes are overflowing with scams and spams.

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Oh man. I ended up with zero gold. You can borrow my gold, but I'm afraid that's an empty promise.

I encounter scams all the time, mostly because I answer calls from numbers I don't recognize. I hate scammers, but I love a good attempted scam. I find them amusing. Maybe I'm the problem. But I can't help myself. Scams are great fodder for stories. I've written about a few scams that have been attempted on me. My favorite was a guy who came to my door (yes, there are still door-to-door salespeople) who tried to pitch me on free solar that somehow results in free drinking water for kids in Africa. Total scam.

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Yes, why are there so many solar panel scams? I've seen a few of them this past year. Ballsy to do a scam in-person! That requires moxy.

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I assume that whenever there’s a new big thing like solar there are going to be scammers who swoop in and take advantage. I find this especially upsetting with something like solar though because it’s not just the scam it’s something that undermines people’s trust in solar more broadly. That said, the tell was pretty obvious - free stuff that should cost tens of thousands of dollars.

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